Friday, January 25, 2013

To all you Single Ladies

“SINGLE”
1:not married 2: unaccompanied by others 3: consisting of having only one part, feature, or portion.
And that my friends, is Webster's definition of single.
Some stalker who takes pictures of only lonely people cataloged this photo
Often times in the past when I was single I thought of myself as not being whole without someone. I've felt this way many times! Then I realized I was thinking of myself as the "3" part of the definition of single "consisting of only one part, feature, or portion" I.E without my other half. Like a missing portion; deprived of my other. Single. But that refers to an item, a Tupperware dish, per se, not a human begin with a complex heart.

So my friends, does single mean broken? Incomplete? Deprived of something? Should single people be ashamed of their social status? Are married people somehow "better" or "lucky" at life because they have met their significant other, but you, single person, must trudge it on alone? 

Girls: how many times have you seen another "OMG my boyfriend loves me so much look at the flowers he bought me look at this cute picture of us at the mall look at the food we ate together omg we are so happy life is complete yay" and felt that ping of loneliness that comes from the realization that your Facebook is full of portrait shots detailing your love affair with your cell phone?
Don't leave me sexy electromechanical device!
Well, you are not alone. (but perhaps you could upload less pictures of your new haircut. 33 is a bit extreme)  Silliness aside, this a real issue and I've seen it in my personal life and all over the blog sphere. I just wanted to let you know that people who are in relationships are just as insecure as those who are not. Being in a relationship does not elevate you to any "special" status of human existence.

Being single really only means you are not married. It does not mean you are broken. It does not mean you are incomplete or alone--it does not mean that you are missing out on anything! Being single does not define you, it is just a way of describing how you are currently living your life.

Urban Dictionary says: Single
 1. When you are currently not in a relationship with a significant other
That's a better definition of singleness. Not broken, not incomplete. As a complex human being, you definitely don't consist of only one part, because unlike an item, you are a person, and you are never alone. God is always with you. Along with 7 billion other Earth-dwellers! Your singleness means only that you are not currently in a relationship. There is nothing wrong with you.
Philippians 4:6-7Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Do you want to be an Urban Dictionary single or do you want to be a Webster's single?  How will you live?
 1 Samuel 12:24
But be sure to fear the LORD and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you.
I think the first step to recovery is admitting the issue. Hello. My name is Carolynn and I was a Webster's dictionary single. Now I'm married and I'm still Webster's dictionary single. Because no man can fill the void in my heart--only God can. Will you let him be enough for you?

1 comment:

Rachel said...

I was single until Angel, obviously, but I was blessed in that it never bothered me. I think I was pretty odd in that I moved pretty much straight from "Eww, boys are gross" stage into "Engaged" stage. Don't know how that happened. My family was shocked, too. They were like, "You're always mean to boys if they like you--what the heck happened with Angel?"
Must have been a God thing.
I agree with your post, though. There is no reason to look at singleness as a bad thing!