what is wrong with me

This started in 2012. Well, actually before that. I had issues. Autoimmune issues, although I didn't know that is what they were called and I didn't know that some of the things I was experiencing were not normal. 

In 2012 they escalated to the point where I was in pain almost all the time, had debilitating brain fog and other serious issues that I won't go into (but I did blog about them starting in 2013 so you can snoop if you are really bored and want to read my horrendously bad grammar) Okay, I still have bad grammer. But in 2013 it was a lot worse. 

we take naps now, and sometimes I take selfies

In the middle of 2019 I was doing great. I had the best gut health in years. I actually felt hope! I was able to enjoy life and we were even thinking about having another baby.

Now, in 2020, my health has spiraled out of control. It's the worst it has been since 2012-2013 which was an awful set of years. What started the downward trend? I had a round of antibiotics (my first in 8 years) for strep in November of 2019. Nothing has been the same since. All my years of work were reversed in one. week. ONE WEEK. Now after two miscarriages in 2020, my health has declined to the point of despair. 

Before I get into my current health issues, I want to tell you about how I eat. We started eating the Weston A Price diet mid 2019, after around 5 years of being paleo and 2 years of being keto (we did take breaks here and there). I was doing GREAT on it, before the aforementioned antibiotics. In desperation I have switched back to mostly paleo diet, but have not been on it long enough to see results yet.

I love diets. I do. I like not being in pain and being able to function as a human. But I am tired of diets. I want healing, not temporary relief from my symptoms until I eat a "bad" food. So, what "healed" me in 2019? The Nemechek protocol. But it quit working after the antibiotics in November of 2019 even though I was still (and am, even today) doing his protocol. Why did it stop working? I don't know. If I did, I would be writing a different blog post. 

There is nothing wrong with diets, but I don't want to stay on one forever. The paleo diet worked for me in 2013 and took away almost all of my symptoms, but as soon as I eat a "bad" food, I have symptoms again. Foods are not good or bad. (Well, unless its preservatives, food coloring, or sugar, but that is a different post for a different day...) It's my body that is bad with food, not the food that is bad for my body. Hey, it only took me 6 years to realize this, so yeah, not that major of a revelation... (sarcasm) 

In 2019 I was eating everything and I felt great. In 2020, the list of foods I can eat without pain, brain fog, constipation and malaise is shrinking and I am panicking about it. I don't want to go through this again. I can't do this again. Why is this happening again. 

What is wrong with me?

Every day I am so tired. Bone tired. I take a vitamin (5-mthfr, whole foods) and vit-D daily. I take juice plus. I eat grass fed beef and raw dairy. I eat organic vegetables. I've been eating this way for YEARS. I pay an arm and a leg for my food and I still feel like crap every day, have horrible brain fog, a huge amount of bloating, constipation, and want to sleep for hours lunch. After my nap I STILL WAKE UP TIRED.  

The only good thing is I don't have any pain like I did in 2013. I remember that pain. Horrible joint pain. Sometimes I couldn't get out of bed it would hurt so bad, up and down my arms (I found out it was from dairy and gluten) No pain now, thank goodness, but everything else is crushing me. I can't parent. I can't homeschool my children when I can't keep my eyes open.

I've been to the doctor before, back when this all started and my concerns were always dismissed. I am hesitant to try again, but I might. I'm desperate. I'm desperate enough that I ordered some crazy expensive tea with mushrooms in it and am praying it helps. I know I probably have a hormone issue, but I don't know what one. I have low sex drive (but doesn't everyone when nursing?) am irritable (but I have small children and there is a pandemic going on) and definitely deal with stress. I also know what a doctor is going to do, or at least I think I do. They are going to want to order a ton of blood work. I absolutely hate and despise and am terrified of blood work. This is keeping me from reaching out. Usually, I will just take my husband with me and I'll be fine...he will hold my hand. He will tell me I am being a big baby when I cry. But with Covid, I can't even do that, he won't be allowed to come with me. And I just don't think I can do it alone right now.

Anyway, send prayers. And I am okay with some internet diagnosis. If you have heard of something, please link it below and I will research it. 

Adventures in High Blood Sugar

Since my gestational diabetes diagnosis I check my blood sugars once or twice a month to make sure they are on track and that I am not developing type two diabetes. The last two months they have been high. My highest reading was 185 but I was consistently getting 165 and 155 two hours after meals. That number is supposed to be under 120. High blood sugars damage your organs and decrease your lifespan. I want to live as long a life as I can and I like my organs working at 100%, thank you. Having these high numbers has caused me a lot of stress in the last two weeks as well as panic and depression. I am working so hard and doing so much to help manage my autoimmune problems and adding one more like type two diabetes to the list felt like a weight I could not handle.

I have a very knowledgeable Type one diabetes friend and couch who helps people with diabetes and fitness in general, so I booked a 30 minute call with her. I knew I needed outside help. I was exercising 40 minutes a day minimum and eating under 150g carbs a day (half the recommend American limit) with plenty of organic veggies and fruits. This is what I had been doing since I quit keto when Becky was 8 months old--and it had been working for me just fine. Until now, that is.

Becky, 18m old

I went into the call feeling helpless and lost. I came out of the call with a plan! I decided to go down to 50-100g carbs a day, add some strength training to my workout (previously only yoga and walking) and make a food diary so I can see what foods are "problem foods" for me. I went sugar free (except fruit). I had been consuming some honey and some coconut sugars and I've now switched to stevia and monk fruit to sweeten things if I need it. It has been two weeks and my sugars have not been over 110 two hours after eating. I am thrilled!! I really don't want to eat keto again--I would miss foods that I love. On my modified low carb "diet" I can still eat potatoes and beans--two of my favorite foods!

I did find a lot of problem foods that I have cut out. Rice is one--it elevates my blood sugar like nothing else. So do all the gluten free flours like buckwheat and sorghum that I had been baking with. I have switched to just using almond flour and coconut flour with maybe a tablespoon or two of gluten free flours to make it taste more like the "real" thing.

In the last 10 years I have changed up my entire way of eating many times. I went vegan first, gluten free, dairy free, paleo, keto... every time I make a change it is so stressful for a week or two (or three!) while I figure it all out and see if it is right for me. My body is changing as I age and especially after pregnancy! I am glad that I have been able to make elimination diets work for my health and the health of my family. But boy, it is hard.

This August we start Reuben's low key preschool program and this will be another change for our family that will ripple through the next 18 years of his life! Keep me and mine in your prayers and thank you for reading!

Diet Woes and a Health Update

If you have followed my blog for awhile, you know I have gut problems. I finally found a diet that works (dairy and gluten free, preservative free and low sugar) for my myriad of problems. I have a wheat allergy, a dairy intolerance, insulin resistance (prediabetic), and chronic constipation. When I don't change my diet I have the following symptoms: brain fog, joint pain, anxiety, tired all the time, constipation, miscarriages, sugar cravings, stomach pain, eczema, itchy flaky scalp, ear issues and low immune system. Wehww, even I am tired after typing all that.

Thankfully after suffering for years I know what to do. If you have followed my journey I tried a bunch of things and went to a lot of doctors (and got nowhere) before stumbling upon the paleo diet 5ish years ago. The paleo diet solved 90% of my problems. Than I went keto after that. Keto solved the problem the paleo diet did not solve: my brain fog. However, keto made my constipation worse. So still not ideal. Also keto isn't very fun and I didn't like it.

Now for the last 6 months I have just been dairy, preservative, low-sugar, and gluten free eating almost 100% from a cookbook called "Nourishing Meals". Eating this way solves all of my issues most of the time as long as I make sure to not eat a lot of carbs or honey (because of the diabetes) and exercise. I have to exercise twice a day, every day. I usually do after breakfast and lunch as these times are the easiest for me. That only leaves dinner, so I try to eat something low carb for dinner so my blood sugar is not high. I do yoga after breakfast and go for a walk with the kids after lunch (bonus: it puts Becky to sleep for her nap). I do check my sugars with my monitor, and if I don't exercise it is usually 140 or higher two hours after eating. That is not good.

I have learned that I can't eat out. Maybe once every 2-3 months. I also can't eat food other people make. Mostly because they are not gluten free and a tiny bit of gluten destroys me. And also preservatives, sugar, dairy... they can be hidden in a lot of things that someone without my range of issues is not aware of. "Person A" can tell me "its gluten free" but the last thing they cooked in the dish had gluten in it, so I'll be in a world of pain. I have two good friends who are also gluten free and I do eat after them, but I am no longer going to eat anything after anyone else. It makes events hard sometimes. And it makes people bringing me meals almost impossible. 

It does not help that Reuben seems to have inherited a lot of my issues. Poor kid. Sometimes when he tries a new food or has a lot of new things he gets sick and throws up. I don't think even he understands it. Becky does not have any issues that I have noted thus far, and I am so happy for her! I never wanted to pass on my health problems to my kids, but like everything else I don't get to choose. It just happened. At least I know how to help him deal with it so he is not in a world of pain like I was in my 20s. 

I am very lucky that I am strong enough to babywear. I am lucky that I found a diet that works for me so I can function. I try to remind myself of this at potlucks where I can't eat anything or when someone offers to bring me food and I have to turn them down. My health comes with a price and that's okay. I have to make my health the number one priority so that I have energy and vitality to live. 

I am learning to make everything from scratch this year. I now make bread and all nut milk from scratch. To supplement for calcium, I eat egg shells (properly cooked). This week I am making sourdough (gluten free) and ordered a yogurt maker. I also make my own salad dressing, but I have only been doing that for a month. It takes a lot of time but I feel great. Preservatives do drain my energy and hurt my gut. So does soy. Those last two things are in most prepackaged foods, so I try my hardest to avoid them. Bonus, we buy less plastics! Although that was not intentional!

How are you doing on your health journey, friend? 

What I Eat in a Day: The Cheat Day

Everyone has cheat days. Or is it just me? This is what I eat on a typical rushed cheat day! Bonus, I show what Reuben eats too! Although, this is normal meals for him, since he does not have allergies to gluten and can eat beans too, things I commonly avoid. Well, I always avoid gluten on EVERY day. But cheat days include corn noodles. And ice-cream!

What do you eat on a "cheat" day?

   

A week of paleo dinners pt 2

A week of paleo dinners. I didn't mean for all of these (okay, all but one) to be one pot paleo dinners, but they are! I must have been stressed. I usually do one pots on days where I am really busy. Who am I kidding...I'm always busy! I have a toddler. And a husband. And a YouTube channel. And I like to shower instead of slaving in the kitchen... but I also like to eat, so some slaving is necessary...

Day One: Chicken stew. Chicken thighs, various veggies, a little bit of homemade chicken stock, coconut aminios, and seasonings. I can't remember what kind of seasonings. It was good.

Day 2: Chicken sausage cooked with red bell peppers, kale, and seasoning. Paired with a sweet potato.

Day 3: Paleo jerk chicken with a side of veggies.

Day 4: It's not a good picture. I was hungry. Chicken sausage, red bell pepper, Chinese five spice powder and green cabbage.

Day 5: This was a particularly bad day, I was not in the mood for cooking. It's just ground beef with greens and bacon and some seasoning. It was good, easy, and quick: just what I needed.

Day 6: A fancy day. Regular pizza on the right for hubby, with cheese and gluten. Paleo pizza for me and the squish. I cheated and put some cheese on my side. It was worth it. Total weekend splurge meal. We watched doctor who and ate pizza and it was great.

Day 7: Curry. We really do eat curry once a week. This was red curry, and it was yummy!

That is what I made. I love cooking, and I love eating this way, and taking care of my body and having energy and not being in pain... not pictured, is the side I usually make for hubby. Like if I make curry, I make him rice, and sometimes dinner rolls (like the instant kind) for other dishes, so he can have carbs he enjoys. I just don't eat it. Makes us both happy!

Want to see more of what I eat? Check out my other what I ate (paleo) post here!

12 Months Paleo

I made it an entire year, more or less! Last year I felt great, had better energy and less pain, all because of the paleo diet. I'm very happy. I hope this year has more of the same in store for me.

I probably won't write monthly update posts anymore--more like a post every 6 months. So the next one will be 18m paleo. There just isn't a lot to report now that this has become my way of life.

So, what's changed? I no longer eat a lot of almond flour. I have one to two almond flour desserts a month, if that. I used to bake all the time when I first started paleo, but now I have slacked off a lot. With a baby, I'd rather spend my free time knitting now. 

I'm also not strict paleo anymore. I occasionally consume hummus, and sometimes gluten free crackers (dipped in the hummus, YUM). I've found a really good type of vegan bread that does not irritate my stomach, and I've been enjoying sandwiches. Nothing has to be 100%. The main thing is I am symptom free, happy, and active! I am still 80-90% paleo, and this still works for me. I can't imagine going back to the way I used to eat, with gluten and dairy daily, but eating a few of my favorite foods now and again isn't wrecking my gut like it used to. So now I can eat out and just keep it dairy, soy and gluten free--opening up a lot more options for enjoying my existence.  I used to just be able to eat at Zoe's Kitchen and Chipotles, but now I can almost eat anywhere.

If I have a reaction I can always dial it back more, but for now I am doing well.

I also started meal planning again. Right now I'm writing each meal I make on an index card, with the ingredients and instructions on the back. I just pick 6 cards each week and it makes grochery shopping so easy. Also, I know what I'm making daily for dinner and don't have to do the "what's in the fridge" scan anymore at 5pm when my toddler is hungry and staring at me.

I'm still enjoying my paleo journey. I'm still creating fun paleo recipes--I really need to publish a cookbook sometime, hah. Maybe I will?

11 Months Paleo

New year, new me, right? Well, I brought 30 other years into this year with me, so I don't think it works that way. I'm still going strong paleo and loving it, for the most part. I do get an occasional desire for something, but usually I just look up a good paleo recipe and try it out. It helps that I love trying something new, for sure.

I decided to measure myself this month. I think it's been five months since I've measured. I don't exercise often, I average about twice a week and I'm happy with it, for now, so I don't expect much.

My new measurements
Thigh: 23 inches
Bust: 37 inches
Underbust: 31.5 inches
Hips: 42 inches
Belly: 34.5 inches
Upper Arm: 11 inches


The only thing I've lost is a bit of bust (1 inch) and a bit of belly (.5 inches) I think. It isn't about the numbers--it's about feeling good and having energy. And I feel good and have energy when I eat this way. I'm not inflamed. I'm not rashy. I can get up and go and I look forward to eating. Life is good.

I didn't eat the best over the holidays, allowing myself way to much dairy (really makes me inflamed) and I have been trying to cut back on that. Its so hard to cut something out when it becomes "normal" again.

But I'm feeling good, and cute, with new bangs and long hair and clothes that fit. And that is what really matters.

10 Months Paleo

I've been paleo 10 months. This month I've indulged in a bit much rice. But hey, its the holiday season and I love rice, so whatever. It hasn't bothered me yet, but as rice has basically no nutritional value so I usually don't eat it. But...mmmmmh so good! I am not worried about my consumption of a few cups of rice a week at all. It's hard not to eat it when I make it so often for my carb loving husband!

This month is turning out harder than others for this paleo foodie--all the Christmas parties where I can't really eat anything. Although I did go to one with a pineapple tray that was excellent! I realize no one wishes to exclude others, but food sensitivities and allergies can make even the strongest person a little sappy, watching everyone else have their cake and eat it too. Paleo cake is good, but I can't cook it all the time. Nor do I expect others too. I'm not upset. Just truths.

I've been baking weekly at home, making my favorite treats. I plan on eating some dairy on Christmas, because I love cream cheese icing and I won't be able to say no. This is also something I am not going to beat myself up about. No one can be a staunch perfectionist all of the time, and I know I can tolerate dairy to a point--like once or maybe twice a month (but I still try not to, because holy bloating). Christmas is just the time for one of these wonderful exception moments.

I still plan on being paleo for the foreseeable future. My next plan of action is to buy Well Fed Weeknights. I love MJ's paleo cookbooks and definitely want to get my hands on her third installment. A book of paleo dinners that are all under 45 minutes? Call me hooked.

Other than that, I need to cultivate some herbs. I'm running low, and herbs are next to godliness in a paleo kitchen.

Paleo Cranberry Lemon Cake

I had some cranberries and a bunch of lemons, and wanted to create a dessert for my small group. I made this one up on my own, too! I am proud that it turned out incredibly scrumptious! This recipe is paleo, dairy, oil, refined sugar and gluten free. Enjoy!

You Will Need:

• 2 cups almond flour
• 1/2 cups coconut flour
• 1/2 cups full fat coconut milk (like the kind you would drink, I use so delicious brand)
• 3 fresh lemons, juiced
• 1 teaspoon lemon zest (grated lemon rind)
• 2 tablespoons tapioca flour
• 1 tea baking soda
• 1/2 cup pure maple syrup
• 2 eggs

• 2 cups fresh cranberries
• 1 cup honey 

Preheat oven to 306 degrees f. Throw the first 9 ingredients into the bowl and whisk until combined. Set aside. In a separate bowl, throw the cranberries in and wash them, and pulse in a food processor for 10 seconds. Add in the honey to the processor and pulse for 20 seconds, or until combined to your liking. I had to scrape down the sides a few times and break up some clumps.

This cake is made to bake in a bread pan. I coated the pan with coconut oil to help it not stick, but if you want oil free, just line it with parchment paper. Put half the batter in, layer the cranberry-honey mixture next, and place the other half of the batter on top.

Bake, uncovered, for 40 minutes with oven rack in the center. The top should be slightly browned and a fork should come out clean (might have cranberry goo on it, but cake wise clean). Enjoy and share with a friend!

Paleo Butternut Alfredo

This is a total comfort food for me. Now I eat corn and quinoa noodles with this (they don't bother me) but if you are strict paleo I would use a (already cooked) spaghetti squash and add those "noodles" in where I add in my quinoa/corn organic noodles. I bake my spaghetti squash in the oven for about 1.5-2 hours. I just poke holes in it with a fork and bake at 350 degrees. *WARNING* This recipe calls for ALREADY SOAKED raw cashews. So soak some cashews.

You Will Need:

• Three cups diced butternut squash, frozen or raw
• 2 tbsp butter flavored coconut oil (or butter)
• One diced onion 
• 1 teaspoon rosemary, dried 
• 1 tablespoon fresh sage (or sub 1 teaspoon dried thyme)
• 3 cups coconut milk (from a carton, like the kind you would drink) 
• 1 cup chicken broth (for vegan, sub vegetable broth) 
• 2 tbsp nutritional yeast
• 1/2 cup cashews soaked for at least one hour (if you have a vitamix blender) or 3 hours for a regular blender or food processor 
• 3 tbsp honey
• 1/2 teaspoon allspice 
• salt/pepper

Cook 2 tbsp coconut butter, diced onion, 1 teaspoon rosemary and 1 tbsp fresh sage until onions are translucent. Add in butternut squash and 1 cup of coconut milk and 1 cup chicken broth. Bring to a boil and cover--reduce head and simmer for 15-20 minutes covered until squash is cooked and soft. I found the frozen squash takes 15 minutes and the raw cubed squash takes 20 to soften.

While that is simmering, add 2 cups coconut milk, your cashews, and 2 tbsp of nutritional yeast. Blend until smooth.

When your squash is soft (after the 15-20 min) flatten it with a potato masher until its a gravy. Add in your vegan cheese mix from the blender, 3 tbsp honey and 1/2 teaspoon allspice. Add in a pinch of salt and pepper.

Stir. At this point I add in my noodles and cover, adding a little more coconut milk or water to make it not so thick so that the noodles can cook (not more than 1 cup) I simmer my noodles, stirring occasionally, for about 8-10 minutes. If you are using the spaghetti squash noodles, I would just add them and stir for 1-2 minutes because they should already be cooked and tender.

Serve. Eat. It's that good!

Thai Ginger Paleo Meatballs

I love meatballs. Since we do a lot of food prep around here, I make meatballs at least twice a month. Usually more. I've tried almost all of the meatballs in Well Fed 2, and while I like most of them, I also enjoy being spontaneous and making up my own recipes.

This is one of those.

Preheat oven to 360 degrees f and cover two pans with parchment paper. This makes about 30-40 balls depending on how you portion them.

Thai Ginger Paleo Meatballs

• 1 lb ground beef
• 1 lb ground pork
• 1 tablespoon sesame seed oil
• 4 tablespoons coconut aminos 
• 1 teaspoon powdered ginger or a one inch piece of fresh, grated ginger 
• 1 small onion, minced
• 2 eggs (I used duck, I am sure that chicken would work fine as well)
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 teaspoon powdered garlic or two cloves garlic minced 
• handful of mushrooms (I used shiitake) about 1/2 cup roughly chopped

Mix all of the above starting with the beef and pork. Make sure well incorporated. I use a tablespoon to portion it into balls, and arrange on a baking pan. Bake at 360 degrees f for 25 minutes, or until cooked through.

Six Months Paleo

Six months and going strong! I feel like I've finally hit a place where my gut is starting to thrive. I've had gut issues all my life so it feels really amazing to have a tolerably functioning one. I've been having an aloe smoothie daily, as well as eating lots of great lakes jello. I also plan on making myself some bone broth this week to further boost my gut!

We got a instant pot this month. I am in love. It's quick, easy, and delicious. Any crock pot recipe can be made in it--but within 20-40 minutes, instead of hours. It's been a game changer around here, and this tired sleep deprived mama is grateful. My husband also loves using it and has actually cooked meals! If you know my husband--he doesn't cook. Expect he's cooking. Needless to say, I am thrilled and tickled pink.

I also started exercising again after a two month break. I feel fit. My belly still protrudes, even now 13 months postpartum, but I am fitting into my pre-pregnancy clothing and feeling so much positivism about my body.

Here are my current measurements:
Thigh: 23 inches (previously 25 inches)
Bust: 38 inches (same)
Underbust: 31.5 inches (.5 inch lost)
Hips: 42 inches (2 inches lost!)
Belly: 35 inches (same)
Upper Arm: 11 inches (same)

I was surprised to see the numbers, given I didn't exercise much (besides chasing a toddler) since I last measured myself. I still hope to see improvements in my belly. I'm happy, more or less, with everything else. And amused at my content feelings too.

Here is to another month of health.

5 Months Paleo

Well, to be fair I did take a one-week break from paleo during my husband's one week of vacation this month. During this time I ate rice and a few gluten, soy, and dairy free treats that I don't normally eat. It was a relaxing break from the normal food prep I do, but I know my body suffered. I got brain fog, swelling, and had to take off my wedding ring. But I did get to enjoy toast (vegan and gluten free) with my husband's (gluten) toast in the mornings with breakfast. It was easier to feed myself just staying gluten, dairy and soy free, but I went right back on the paleo diet when husband returned to work. I enjoyed my break, perhaps I will do it again next year. (Anyone else find they get less done when their husband is home on vacation too?)

Anyway, I feel like I've got this paleo thing down, like it's second nature almost. Every Saturday I make ranch for the week, and mayo and ketchup too. I also prep a muffin for breakfast usually, since I am bleary-eyed and hungry when waking and it's the time my son is the most clingy as well. The muffins usually run out by Wednesday or Thursday and so I usually make more...

I also think I know the secret to paleo food: it's in the sauce. Most literally in the sauce. I usually make stir fry for dinner and having a good sauce is key to making it scrumptious. My favorite is the orange chicken sauce in Against All Grain's first cookbook. I also like the sunflower seed butter one in Well Fed Two. Sunflower seed butter by itself (not cooked) is disgusting.

I am still committed to this paleo journey and I am loving how great I feel and how much energy I have. Buying and eating local is fun too! We eat lots of zucchini (so easy to add to everything, or make into a "hummus" for dipping) and I snack on fruit all the time. Seasonally, I am eating organic cherries now. Reuben loves them too, he had some for lunch today!

So this is what 5 (ish) months paleo looks like. Next month will be 6! My goals next month are to start exercising again (it's been two months...) and to weigh/measure myself and take a selfie.

4 Months Paleo

Woah! Four months! Who would have thought? I feel at ease with the paleo diet finally. I'm also learning some things: like I need lots of spices to make things taste good. And also spices are amazing. What did I do before? I think I just added cheese to everything.

The number one spice I seem to use is cumin. I loveeeeeee it. I put it on raw cauliflower before roasting (just like french fries) and I've put it in nut cheese and also curry and many other dishes. It's delish.

I also bought two more paleo books: Well Fed 2, and AAG: Meals Made Simple. I've cooked several meals from these two books so far (about 2-3 a week) and all I can say is YUM! AAG has an amazing bread recipe that even the husband loved--AND a cheesy dish that husband did not know included no cheese (cashew cheese). I'm sold. Definitely worth the money if you are going paleo and don't want to figure out how to feed yourself delicious food on your own. I'm going to try her cake recipe next.

I made @meljoulwan chicken Nanking #paleo #paleolunch #wellfed #wellfed2

A photo posted by Carolynn M (@moonofsilver) on May 21, 2016 at 10:04am PDT

Yum. I'm excited about food again, what can I say.

I also gave up corn this month. Before I was allowing myself both organic corn and peanut butter, but now I am just eating peanut butter when I feel like it. I don't think it bothers me, so it's okay. Giving up corn was a choice mainly of finances as we are still trying to get out food budget under control. Our hope is to not spend more than $2,000 USD a month--and right now half of that is going to food! That will change, this week I actually only spent $100 on food and (gasp) made my own ketchup, mayo and other sauces to help save money. Most of the inflation we've seen to our food budget has come from paleo sauces--and thus making these myself (even if it's more time consuming) is worth it to save money! We've also been going to the farmers market, and this has helped save money too. The produce isn't technically organic, but buying local and visiting the farms and eating in season has it's perks too!

Last but not least, I weighed myself and did a happy dance, as I am down to 165 (10 pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight of 155 and 15 from my goal of 150). I know weight can be a hard thing to talk about tactfully, and I struggle with it still. But I am having more good days than bad days and trying to look at overall health instead of numbers on the scale.

Here is to the next month of paleo delights! If you want to see what I eat daily, check out my daily vlogging channel, I show my food (and prep) most days.

Palelo Cucumber Apple Bacon Salad

One day I was hungry, but didn't know what to eat. I opened the fridge and saw I had some apples, a few cucumbers and some bacon. Thus the paleo cucumber apple bacon salad was created!

I baked 6 strips of bacon in the oven (20 minutes at 350 degrees f) until they were fairly crispy. I like my bacon crispy!

Then I chopped up two small green apples and a large cucumber (the same amount of apple as cucumber, a 1:1 ratio), shredded the bacon into small pieces, and combined it all with a pinch of salt, pepper, and a teaspoon of chili powder and about a 1/2 cup of paleo mayo. It made enough for three servings, and the combination of sweet green apples and chilled cucumbers and the salty bacon with the spicy powder is divine!

I am sure I am not the first one to think of this, but to me it was an amazing discovery, and an awesome snack for a hot summer day!

The Best Paleo Chocolate Chip Cookies

I've searched around for a good paleo chocolate chip cookie. I've tried several recipes--it's either too dense, or too chewy, or flat, or it tastes way to "paleofied" and not like the real thing.

I want real chocolate chip cookies. And I want them to be simple--not requiring any refrigeration of dough or weird, hard to find paleo flours. (I hate the word "blanched") I also want easy--no weird molding to make them appear more like traditional cookies or whatever. Thus these are "drop" cookies.

After a lot of experimentation, reading and recipe searching I've made these.

And I think they are perfect. I make them weekly.

You Will Need

• (I used blanched) 1 cup Almond Flour  
• 1/4 cup Coconut Flour
• 3 tablespoons olive oil
• 2 tablespoons coconut oil
• 3 heaping tablespoons Cashew Butter (mine was not raw)
• 1/4 teaspoon salt 
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• almost 1/2 cup mini chocolate chips (or less if you hate chocolate)
• 2 eggs
• 1/4 cup honey

Preheat oven to 350 degrees f, and Cover a pan with parchment paper. Mix all above ingredients together in whatever random order you want, stir. Make sure the coconut oil is not in one big lump. Let the dough sit for 5 minutes to "raise" or just cook how it is if you are lazy. Place heaping tablespoons on the parchment paper, spaced about 1 inch apart. I got three rows of 5, so 15 cookies. Cook for 10 minutes or until the top is slightly browned. Cool. Eat.

They are delicious. Let me know if you make them, okay?

3 months paleo

Three months. It feels like such a short time, actually. A lot has happened this month! For one, my husband stopped being paleo. That's been hard, as its difficult for me not to cheat and just eat gluten, soy and dairy free... But he is still basically paleo for dinner, since I cook dinner and I really don't have time to create separate things. He still supports me on my paleo journey, too. He just wants a cheeseburger from Burger King once in a while, and there is nothing wrong with that. His body does not react to gluten or dairy, and he honestly struggles with hunger when following a paleo diet. I want my husband to listen to his own body, as I listen to mine--this means he buys his own snacks and even has been making his own breakfast.

I also tried to reintroduce dairy into my diet this month. I still want to be low carb, high fat--and dairy falls into that category (but is more then a keto thing). Grass fed butter is also a paleo staple and I've been missing it.

Let's just say my body does not like dairy. I looked 6 months pregnant and had miserable stomach cramps the entire time. As soon as I removed cow products from my diet my bloating and pain went away. I am happier dairy free, and I will probably try dairy again--but in a year or two, to see if my gut just needs more time to heal.

I tried some new paleo food as well. I made this raspberry cheesecake--to be honest, it was just too rich for me to enjoy it much. I didn't like it. I have found my staple chocolate chip cookie recipe: it's a (very) modified version of this recipe. My favorite paleo snack happens to be roasted cauliflower. It's so easy and just like french fries.

Paleo food is so easy. These garlic and cumin cauliflower bits are so good!

A photo posted by Carolynn M (@moonofsilver) on Apr 20, 2016 at 1:46pm PDT

I'm still eating peanut butter, and I sometimes will eat organic corn. I also wanted to measure myself this month. I measured myself on my four week paleo update here, and I wanted to see how things had changed. I took these measurements on the 25th of April, so four days before I actually hit 3 months.

I was delighted to see that my weight is down! I have been trying to exercise at least every other day. I am now 170--the same weight I was when I gave birth to Reuben (I lost 30 pounds when I gave birth, gained 10ish back before beginning to exercise again) but this still leaves me 20 pounds over my prepregnancy weight. My goal weight is 150--it's where I personally feel the most comfortable.

Current measurements:

Thigh: 25 inches (previously 22 inches, how did I gain 3 inches?!)
Bust: 38 inches (same)
Underbust: 32 inches (1 inch lost)
Hips: 44 inches (2 inches lost!)
Belly: 35 inches (2 inches lost!)
Upper Arm: 11 inches (2 inches lost)

I am really excited to see results. Having my clothes fit better and seeing these numbers is helping my self-esteem. As a result I have been feeling overall more body positive. That has helped my mood swings so much! And it's also helped my sex life--I really am not interested in showing my body to my husband when I feel bloated, fat, and horrible.

That's three months paleo. I wonder what four months will bring? Maybe a little brother or sister for Reuben!

Paleo Apple Muffins

Breakfast is honestly the hardest meal for me. Not only am I tired and juggling a newly awoken baby, I am usually starving from breastfeeding throughout the night. I don't want to eat bacon and eggs every morning either, and all my favorite morning foods either my son is allergic to or it's not paleo. (avocado, pancakes, biscuits...need I go on?)

I've started making muffins, usually on Sunday night to last me through the week. They are quick, easy and help me not stare hopelessly in the fridge, my stomach growling. A few weeks ago I found this recipe, and below is how I modified it.

• 2 cups lightly packed almond flour
• .5 teaspoons baking soda
• A dash of salt 
• 1 teaspoon cinnamon
• 1 teaspoon all spice 
• 2 small apples, pealed and grated 
• 1 tablespoon lemon juice 
• 2 eggs
• 2 heaping tablespoons cashew butter (mine was not raw)
• 1/4 cup honey 
• 1 tablespoon olive oil

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit. Grate your apples and drizzle the lemon juice over them, set aside. Combine dry ingredients in another bowl and stir them. Add thc rest of your wet ingredients to the apple lemon bowl and stir. Then add the wet to the dry. Or you can do it like I normally do and just beat it all together in one big bowl. Doing it the first way does make it more flavorful for some odd reason, through. 

Bake in muffin pan with cupcake liners for 20-25 minutes at 350 degrees Fahrenheit. Makes 12 small muffins.  

A week of paleo dinners

This is the paleo equivalent to a chicken enchilada. I have my own paleo enchilada sauce on the left, and some green peppers and a chicken thigh on the right. I cooked the chicken in a mixture of chili powder and coconut aminos with a dash of cayenne pepper. It was delicious. Husband liked it too!

Below we have husband's birthday dinner. I cooked steak in the crock pot with chili powder and garlic on top of a sweet potato. I put some mushrooms and green beans on top of the steak and cooked it for 5 hours on low. I added some nutritional yeast to the veggies,and made these carrot cake cookies as desert. Carrot cake is husband's favorite!

This was my own creation. It's hamburger bacon bark, made with leftovers in the fridge and served with a pickle. This is amazing, and husband has asked me to be sure to make it again! I took half a large zucchini (shredded), half a pack of ground beef, three strips of already-cooekd bacon, a dash of coconut aminos, a pinch of pepper and salt, and two eggs. I mixed them all together and baked flat on parchement paper covered pan at 350 degrees F for 20 minutes. Perfection.

Mexican stir fry with vegan sour cream. Onion, green pepper, loads of garlic with chicken thighs spiced with cumin. I covered it in Muir Glen organic salsa of course!

Paleo sweet potato chili. This is a crock pot recipee. I put half a package ground beef, two cans of  Muir Glen Organic Diced Tomatoes, two large sweet potatoes, half an onion, a bunch of garlic, one cup chicken stock, and 4 tablespoons of chili powder into a crock pot and cooked on low for 6 hours. It was amazing.

Sometimes I just have to have pizza. This is Simple Mills Pizza Dough mix topped with organic spaghetti sauce (works in a pinch for pizza sauce), organic no preservative pepperoni, artichokes and my favorite banana peppers. More sauce for dipping. I looooooveeeee Simple Mills products. They are expensive, but for a spurge...totally worth it. 

What kinds of dinners do you guys eat a week? What do you think of paleo food? Honestly, I love to eat!

Paleo chocolate chip mug cake

I have been trying for awhile to create a mug cake without eggs. My first few concoctions were mush, and the next few were burned on the outside and droopy in the middle. That's when I got the idea to cook this mug cake in a bowl! It worked perfectly. This amazing "mug" cake is egg, dairy, gluten and grain free. I hope you love it as much as I do!

Just a quick note: this does taste a lot like a banana. I like it, but if you don't like ripe bananas, you probably will not be a fan.

What you need:

• 1/2 ripe banana (with spots) mine weighed 1.98oz peeled
• 1 tablespoon of Coconut Flour
• 1 tablespoon of Almond Flour
• 1 tablespoon olive oil
• 1 heaping tablespoon Enjoy Life Chocolate Chips (I used minis)
• 1/2 tablespoon honey
• 1/4 teaspoon baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

Place all ingredients in a microwave safe bowl and mush with a fork until everything is mixed. It should resemble mushed, dewy cookie dough.

Then even it out on the bottom of the bowl, and microwave 2.5 minutes. Let sit 1-2 minutes before eating to firm up (the coconut absorbs liquid) This step is is crucial to it getting the consistency of cake.

Enjoy! Next I am going to work on making a mug cake that uses flax seed instead of egg. Wish me luck!