Thursday, January 9, 2014

Here today, gnome tomorrow

The wonderful, silly, loving and amazing Delirious Rhapsody let me host her gnome over Christmas! What is "host" a gnome? Well, she kidnapped a gnome, packaged him up, and mailed him to me!
He arrived looking rather cute. I let him hang out on my bookshelf for awhile and watch all the shenanigans that my husband, friends, and family participate in. I even played a prank by hiding him in my fridge with the hopes of scaring my husband. You see, my husband has a heart of steal, and no matter what I do (hiding behind doors, making spooky noises...) he is never scared. Where I am frightened by bugs. And irregular noises.
Unfortunately, all this caused was a nonchalant comment about '"why is there a gnome in the fridge, dear, and where is my dinner?" Why, exactly? Well, after a lovely dinner of steak and potatoes, the unthinkable happened. The gnome and my husband became buddies! Something about unfair treatment and such from wives. I guess the gnome has a shadowy past, as well. Anyway, they started taking walks together and drinking together...
Naturally I couldn't handle it, so I put the gnome in the oven as punishment.
To get out of solitary confinement, he agreed to take a selfie with me on the last day of his imprisonment if I would hurry and mail him off to his next host. This was taken right before he bit me on the ear.
I mailed him the next day. I hope it takes months for him to arrive.

No wonder you mailed him off, Deanna--he sure does get into mischief, doesn't he?!
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