Tuesday, August 27, 2013

My Biggest Fear

Are you ever afraid of something?

I'm extremely scared of needles. I hate shots. I hate having my blood drawn. I am so scared of needles that I'd really rather just stay home and suffer then go to the doctor where they might decide to poke me.
I know, its almost statistically impossible to die from having your blood taken, but for some reason I become convinced every time that the nurse is going to accidentally kill me. And yes, I do feel a bit silly afterwards--no matter how real it feels at the time. My logical brain chanting-- its not going to kill you--is always trumped by the  feeling that I'm about to die a terrible and very theatrical death.

Do you have any unreasonable fears? Or is it just me? I'm also afraid of eyes. No really. I hate it when people touch their eyes or take their contacts out. Eww.

Anyway, that brings me to a story. The story of the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.

So, I had to get blood work done. I knew I had to get it done, but I hadn't made the appointment yet. I cried in the shower thinking about making the appointment. I cried after the shower, hoping God would intervene and I wouldn't have to make the appointment. I called my husband and told him I was about to make the appointment. His encouraging texts made me smile through my tears.

My plan was to make the appointment some time tomorrow or the next day (it had to be within 48 hours) when my husband was on lunch so that he could be there. My best friend Larkin was supposed to come over today and we were going to tie dye. It was 10am. I dried my tears and called.

Nurse: Oh, that's easy. Just come by in the next 30 minutes and we'll take care of it.
Me: You mean right now? 
Nurse: Are you busy?
Me: ....no.
Nurse: Okay, see you in 30. Click
Me: OMG!

It was two hours till my husbands lunch. He was in meetings. He couldn't come. My mom lives an hour away and was at work. My sister has two kids. I was going to have to go alone.

Words cannot describe he sheer amount of panic I was feeling at that moment.

Wait--I thought, I'll call my friend! Frantically I called her. I was still crying. I really wasn't kidding when I said having blood work done was my first and greatest fear. She didn't pick up. She keeps different hours then me, usually staying up until 1 or 2 when I go to bed at 10. I called again. And again.

Finally I called her roommate. I bought my wedding cake from her, so I still had her number. She picked up! She seemed kinda confused as to why I wanted her to wake up Larkin, but she did. Yay. And Larkin wasn't mad at me! Double yay. She said she would come. The clouds lifted. I might survive.
So I picked her up and she talked to me and held my hand while the doctor took my blood and, basically saved me from a terrible and painful death by syringe. Haha. I really would have totally freaked without her.

Whats your biggest fear?
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