Interim Days

I have a little bit of sunburn from our lake day on Monday and it's in the pealing stage. By the way, I wore a hat the whole time and stayed in the shade, who knew you could get sunburned like that?  Becky got a little sunburn on her T zone, even though I did put sunscreen on the kids and they wore their hats for most of the time too. Oh well. It isn't a terrible sunburn but it does make me look like a tomato. At least I don't feel like a tomato.

There is supposed to be a huge storm sometime this evening! We are forecast for over an inch of rain, isn't that crazy? I need to go roll the tarps up on our windows before it hits. Right now it is sunny and 95f and we are indoors reading books and relaxing with snacks of cheese.

I made a berry crisp this morning for breakfast and served it with yogurt and honey. My dear friend Kim came over for lunch and I made BLTs. They were delicious. I plan on making some type of pork chop meal for dinner but I am not quite sure which yet. Maybe I should go down and throw those chops in the slow cooker with an onion and an apple and spices...I think I just might.

We are preparing here for Reuben's birthday party which will be celebrated this Friday. I'm making sourdough pizzas for everyone since the party is through lunch time! He's so excited. He's invited all his special friends, Eli and Zebb and Danny and William and Vivian and Aslan and Uriah, and the Fisher boys (there are 6, I forget all their names...). Sadly the Fishers can't come they said they have plans with swim friends. Eli and Zebb and William and Vivian are all coming (thats three families there), and Danny is a maybe, Aslan and Uriah's mom just messaged me with a perhaps as well! Should be a full house here, and much fun and pizza and cake will be had. Reuben's favorite is carrot cake so that is what I will be making. He likes to get a store-bought cake but we have one friend with an egg allergy so I always make an egg-free equivalent. What kind of kid likes carrot cake for his birthday? My kid, of course. 

I always expect the week after a birthday for someone to get sick, so I am also making soup to freeze. Which now that I expect it...probably won't happen. Oh well, it will eventually happen and we will eat the soup. I need to do a week of freezer prep before school starts in August...

I've been grieving so many things this July. Mostly a good friendship that has slowly died these last three years. She was my very best friend and I don't know what happened. I talked about this a little bit in different post but this one is still hitting hard. She's been throwing up boundary after boundary for the past three years and now when I text her she doesn't even reply--for days. Sometimes not at all. I think she has my text muted. And I don't know what happened! I don't know what I did. I still bring her meals when she asks through group texts, because we are on a few groups together. Sometimes I see she replies to group things but never to me, and it hurts. 

I still try to support her, but she doesn't want my friendship. Behavior is a language and her behavior tells me she doesn't want anything to do with me. Which is sad because her kids are best friends with my kids and I'm not sure how to navigate that. When I ask her in person about her silence, she just says she's busy or tired, so for a while I was worried about her being depressed but I don't think that's it.

I thought we were better friends than she did? Or she is withdrawing from the friendship for some reason. Honestly, it's probably both. The hard thing is I can't do anything unless she talks to me and tells me what is wrong. 

I am letting go. And trying to be okay, but I'm not okay. It's hard when your best friend ghosts you. I hope she's happy, and I hope one day we can be friends again. 

That's the biggest thing I'm grieving lately. That and my health, which this week has been abysmal. I've been tired and struggling and not able to do much, but I am hoping that is a season as well. I haven't been exercising as much and I have been eating ice cream sometimes (I usually avoid all sugar) so I think upping my cardio and cutting out the sweets will help. 

I also tried to make an appointment with my natural path and even confirmed the day and time only to have her tell me later she meant to tell me for the week after that, and I am not free that week. Ugh! So now we are fishing around for another day to meet. Crazy things do happen, but only to me. Okay, that's a lie I tell myself, but still, last time I made an appointment with her she forgot to put it in the books and gave it to someone else and that's why I confirmed my current one, only to have a kerfuffle all over again!

I can only laugh. Everyone makes mistakes, even me. I'm sure she feels terrible! 

Well, that's all that's going on in my life besides the huge and colossal argument my husband and I had over the weekend, but that's a story for another day. And yes we still love each other. Being married is hard. 

I wonder how much rain we will actually get? One inch is a lot. It's days like these I'm glad we don't have a basement.