Summer Break Week 6

I finally feel like maybe the physical ramifications of my miscarriage are over. Friday was day three of no bleeding and I'm hoping it won't start again and that all the tissue has passed. What a whirlwind May and June has been and I am excited to welcome in July soon and hopefully the only surprise July will bring is fresh cookies and rain for the garden. 

She would have made a great big sister...

I think I am getting a little burnt out from all the doctor appointments we have been going to. Reuben had two PEMF appointments this week and the kids both had a health check up with a nurse practitioner on Wednesday and we still had our regular two piano lessons and we went back to the creek...all while trying to emotionally navigate a miscarriage and cook alpha gal free for my family.  But some things will be lapsing soon--Reuben has piano lessons only for three more weeks then he has a long break because his teacher is getting married, which is adorable. He's like 23 and ah, young love is both ridiculous and endearing. But everything else stays on our schedule so I better just buck up. PEMF will be twice a week for Reuben until September, and then I might move it to once a week if it is still helping him and we can afford it. Becky's piano lessons are always and obviously school will start back sometime in August and the kids will have more Barton lessons and the pool closes in September...but I want to savor the summer and not be stressed or anxious about what I've chosen to fill it with.

The kids with Charlotte <3

This week was just plain hard. I need to create a new normal and see what I can cut out and maybe just add in more pool time. Some of those things are opposites but...oh, I feel so behind on everything! Since The Miscarriage I haven't been keeping up with cleaning, decluttering, planning, or honestly being much of a fun mom. I've been sad and down. And that makes sense. This baby deserves to be loved and mourned. We did inform Becky and Reuben and it was heartbreaking to see them sad but we wanted them to understand what we were going through and to have the why behind what was wrong with mommy. They desperately wanted me to have another baby and I know that they are also mourning in their own small ways even though they don't talk about it anymore. This whole thing was just so completely unexpected. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the idea that I was pregnant and lost a baby in the span of 8 short weeks. Sweet little baby, I wish I knew if you were a boy and a girl and I wish I had gotten to hold you once before you went to be with God in heaven. 

We also haven't really budgeted since The Miscarriage. We will resume next pay period and see where we are in terms of...everything. That's okay, survival weeks are normal part of life sometimes. 

Today Becky had her piano recital and she did so amazingly. I did her hair and she played Allegretto 1 and Allegretto 2 and it was beautiful. Our neighbor came to see her--Becky invited her--and that was special and sweet. My little girl is growing up so fast and I can't wait to see her play in her next recital in early December. 

Here is to embracing the silliness, the long days, the tired mornings and figuring out what kind of alpha gal free breakfasts to make next week because that seems to be the hardest thing. Here are our go-to alpha gal breakfasts so far: yogurt with berries, waffles, raspberry crumble, muffins, beans with rice and guacamole, and smoothies. For dinner next week we plan to have fish, veggies and rice, basil pesto, nachos with corn chips, chicken fried rice, chickpea salads, and chicken chili. For lunches I am planning on curry, potato salad with deviled eggs, soup with vegan grilled cheese, greek salads with rice, and PBJs with veggies, vegan pizza and spaghetti. Everyone is tired of these meals...myself included. But with no mammal products allowed I really don't know what to do.

Our next big family event is Reuben's 11th birthday. I can't believe its been a whole year already...