One Day

One day I'll be a mother. One day I'll write a book. One day I'll find out who I am, or who I would have been, if I could just sit still enough. Sometimes I think my life consists of 50% slacking off and 50% frenzied attempts at "adulthood" to make up for the former.

Well, I've finished a lot of ideas. More then I ever thought I would. But there are so many more resting just on the tips of my fingers, poised to strike if only I had enough time. Time to make my husband feel special. Time to crochet those lace arm warmers I've been dreaming about. Time to really sit down and read my bible. Time to invest in what I feel my heart desires.

Time to enjoy the summer. Well, I am enjoying this summer. I feel like the older I become the more I learn about myself and human beings and the world. So many feelings and ideas. I rediscover myself every weekend. I think much of life is coming to know yourself more--as you know God more. As you start to understand people and inhibitions and fears and reasons and desires and how a lot of people are ruled by these things--you then see how you yourself are also controlled by such petty emotions. And how it can hurt others.

This week I realized how very little I actually would need to live. Food. A place to sleep. Warmth. Companionship. How much excess we have, and how much diversity it has lead to in our lives. How much clutter, as well. I've seen things divide people. And I've seen them bring them together.

The big thing now is everyone hating on social media and the internet.  Several of my friends have unplugged, saying things like they need to get back to real life, usually followed by a link to that viral video about over-usage of phones that I will spare you yet another glimpse of.

But I look around and all I can see is beauty. Yes, you can use the internet to much. Yes, there are dark seedy places on this wide web you should avoid. No, it shouldn't be the thing your whole life is wrapped around, just like the coffee shop down the street or the girl next door shouldn't be. Like everything else, the internet can be a distraction and a false idol. Just like most things, its the user, not the item, that is corrupted. I think a lot of people forget that.

Without the internet I would never have met Rachel. I would never have met Michelle. I wouldn't even have met my husband. The internet, and my safe usage of it, has brought me so much joy.

Thus today I wanted to say--I am glad to meet you. I hope I can encourage you in this journey we call life--because no one is promised another day, much less an hour. Thank you for being a part of my journey.

Dress: Salvaged
Book Necklace: Vickisheehan

I can't watch anymore.

I'm sorry.

I can't watch TV anymore. (Actually, it's been over three years since I've watched any television, if you don't count netflix. really. three years. and I have not missed it once.)

But lately I can't even watch movies anymore.

It's been ruined for me.

I feel old saying this, but I've seen every movie plot known to men at least 200 times over, and I'm only 28.

It's boring. It's repetitive. I'm tired of it. I need a break.

Thus, I no longer wish to participate in this leisure activity for awhile. Give me a book, or something, anything with depth. Something I can relate to that does not have snakes on a plane or someone being knocked up on a blind date or annoying small talk or unrealistic portrayals of marriage or life after college or teen pregnancy. Give me real people.

I think part of it is that I'm tired of being a consumer. I'm tired of consuming all this stuff that Hollywood and the media keep trying to throw at me. I feel like to them I'm just a pawn, just a little $$ sign. I think most things today are created not out of a genuine love of making, but out of a desire to get money, fame. I feel used by the system.

It's not enjoyable anymore.

I may watch a few movies here and there, but I think as a whole, I'm just done. Done.

What do you think? To be honest, I've never even lived in a house where I had access to cable, so I didn't grow up on TV to begin with--but lately just everything that's come out looks so SO boring. And redone. And oversexed.

For your indelible enjoyment, I have compiled a list of movies I have not yet seen (and won't be seeing). Read them and tell me I'm wrong. If you dare

1. The second hobbit movie. Or even the third one.
2. That sad movie about cancer and faulty stars. nope. not interested.
3. What the heck ever transformer movie we are on now
4. Anything with Captain-Southern-Accent and his boomerang shield
5. Anything with the words "hot-tub" and "time machine" in it. What should I say? *fake voice* "Oh, yay, its another movie about men with a side of hot chicks! I can't wait to see it!" *rolls eyes* Please, tell me how this will edify my life.
6. No thank you, I already know Heaven is for Real.
7. I don't want to see Noah's Ark. I'm tired about hearing how either 1) awesome it is or 2) non-biblical it is. Can't we just see it as a movie, and be done with it?
8. Why do we have a whole movie about a man's hunt to obtain a human penis for his penis collection? (yes that is actually a movie) WHAT?!?
9. I still have not seen that musical Le Mis that everyone was raving about awhile ago. I own the book. I'm sure that's better, so I'll stick with that. Thanks.
10. Anything where the main characters name is Honey booboo. I honestly think most people watch that out of pity for her. Or to realize their life really isn't that bad after all, because at least 3.5 million people don't watch you make a utter fool out of yourself and your daughter on a daily basis.

Movies, you have not impressed me lately. I'm sorry, but we are just going to have to end it. I'll get your coat. Please don't come back. Unless your animated...them maybe I'll try you.

Crochet Companion Cube

I crochet a companion cube for my wonderful husband over vacation. Soft, plushy, and full of love! If you don't know, this cube is part of one of his favorite games, called "Portal". Thus, I knew he'd love this gift!

I made a crochet tutorial that you can download here as well as a video tutorial you can see here on my youtube channel.

What would you do if you had a companion cube? At least tell me you wouldn't incinerate it.