I have been a mess of anxiety and
stress for about six months. I don't know exactly what the issue is--
is it my heart problems and ongoing doctor visits? (I have something
called “early beats in the lower chambers”) The stress of my
husband working late? Beginning to home-school and make plans for
next year while juggling housework and friends, family and fitness?
My decreased bible reading and alone time with God? My mother is sick
and my step brother died in a car accident, my step father and step
sister are grieving. My sister is going through a tough time with her
four kids and single parenting.
A week ago I decided enough was enough.
I was going to take steps to reduce my stress and limit my anxiety. I
started reading my bible every day. I am saying “no” to going out
too often and inviting friends to visit me instead. I cut off access
to the internet (a major source of my mental health woes) and, after
about two days of “withdrawl” I feel amazing. I no longer have
those incessant nagging voices in my head that tell me I need to
check my facebook notifications or update my Instagram. I have been
reading books again and spending my time crocheting, knitting, and
baking. I've felt closer to my actual, real life friends because I
text them when I am lonely instead of blabbing on Facebook groups.
I have shrunk my world again and I feel
so great. There is so much going on in my actual life that the media
on the fringes are no longer helpful boons but annoyances and
pressure.
The internet is a great place, but
apparently I suck at having healthy boundaries.
I know I have said this all before.
Today I found out we are expecting
again! Markey baby number three is due in October. I've already
started praying for my labor and delivery. And for a safe pregnancy.
If you can join me in praying, I would be ever so grateful!
I wonder if it's a boy or a girl? My
gut instinct in boy. I can't believe I get to be blessed with another
baby!!!
