Wednesday, June 1, 2016

Why I have Mom Guilt

Since Reuben will be one soon, I thought I would detail how much Mom Guilt I've had lately.

  1. One day Reuben took a nap. I read a book for the whole 1.5 hours he slept. I've never felt more guilty over not cleaning anything in my entire life.
  2. When Reuben was a newborn, he would cry any time he was separated from me. I used to listen to him wail hopelessly while Daddy held him downstairs while I was in the shower. I desperately wanted him to stop crying, but I also wanted to be clean. And alone.
  3. Ice cream cravings are a total thing postpartum. Except my son is allergic to dairy and soy. But one day I caved had a bowl of soy ice cream because it was in the freezer and I really wanted some. I thought maybe just a little wouldn't hurt Reuben, but he was miserable for three days, and I still feel guilty about it. Two scoops of cold ice-cream was not worth it.  
  4. Giving my kid my phone to chew on so I can have 10 minutes of peace.
  5. Giving my kid the tv remote to chew on so I could have 10 more minutes of peace.
  6. The fact that I use disposable diapers sometimes. Crunchy mom guilt is the worst.
  7. How much I miss my friends that don't have kids. And how little time I actually have to spare thinking about them...because I spend more time wondering about when my son is going to poop.
  8. No matter what I choose (like picking between exercise/playtime with my kid or cooking dinner while he cries/letting my husband do it after a hard day at work) I still end up feeling guilty over it.
  9. Wanting no one touching me.
  10. Getting some alone time to do something fun and being so tired and worn out that I spend the whole half hour trying to figure out what to do and ending up not doing anything... so much guilt.
Well, there are 10 examples of mom guilt I've had recently...and those are just the ones off the top of my head. Being a mom sure is hard...even when I seem to be the most hard on myself.

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