I didn't think I'd still be pregnant on my due date. I really 100% thought I would have given birth by now. But nope, it's Reuben's due date and he seems content to keep poking me from inside my uterus and sitting on my bladder and waking me up with hiccups at all hours of the night. And yes, I am annoyed. He was supposed to be out by now.
But I know that many first babies are late, and that my body can still go into natural labor. It's not too late. I just worry that something is wrong. I have had a lot of braxton hicks and a few other signs of labor but no contractions yet and no sign of my mucus plug or of my water breaking. My doctor says my baby's head is down, but not engaged yet. I have been doing these funny exercises that are supposed to help. But all I can tell is that they make me feel rather silly. And fat. Hah.
I hate waiting. Did I ever tell you that? I am not a patient person. My husband says so too, and he knows me really well. Being a "get 'er done" person can be a blessing and a curse, but in this situation it is definitely a curse. I can't do anything but wait and keep drinking a lot of water and monitoring the swelling on my feet and wondering when my doctor will announce it is time for me to be induced (10 days from now is what she said if everything is still well) and feeling terrified of said inducement because needles and a increased risk of c-section.
All I really can do is cling to to the knowledge that God knows what he is doing, he knows when my son will be born and how. I don't know, and yes that is frustrating but I have to trust him. I would really appreciate some prayers, for patience, and for trust and for peace. And perhaps that Reuben would get the memo. You know, if he's ready and all.