Today was a hard day

Today was Reuben's first home day of cognitive brain development! Yesterday we went to see the brain coach and it was interesting. She made him write his name and the lowercase alphabet from a-z. She said he is really tense when writing and also his eye tracking is all over the place! I never noticed that! Reuben did well with the coach. She had him do some finger and hand exercises, then they played a number-color-shape game back and forth. Then they did a tick-tack-toe worksheet that corresponds to color--that he is supposed to memorize, followed by two worksheets that utilized the same color-number sequence. It was very interesting. I wished my mom, a retired public school teacher, had been there to tell me what it all meant and how this will help my son. She ended by playing the spot-it game. 

This morning we did his equipping minds brain reflex exercises, followed by the sequence of cognitive development games the teacher did on Monday. Reuben did so well. I found the number-color-shape game very challenging. Reuben corrected me several times when I would say the shape instead of the number or the color instead of the shape. I am severely dyslexic, what a trial as a mother! 

I found the tick-tack-toe game fascinating. We played for around 7 minutes trying to memorize the color-number sequence and I found two "trick" ways of winning games by scrutinizing the board. Reuben won one game and the cat got the rest. 

I know I'm giving my thoughts on it all. I asked Reuben for his and he said...he doesn't like it. That was all. Brief and to the point. But he will do it he said, and I reminded him it's only 12 more weeks. We can do this! I'm so proud of him. He's a genius. 

After completing our brain games I did half of Becky's school, then we did two piano lessons--Becky's and Reubens. Poor Becky had an anxiety attack at piano and I felt so bad for her. I need to deep dive into anxiety soon so I can get some tools to help her. She doesn't like feeling stuck and she doesn't like it when she hits a challenging song! Anxiety is no fun...I am thinking Becky is a perfectionist and I am hopeful I can teach her that everyone makes mistakes and learns from them and it's okay, especially when related to a musical instrument. She is a beautiful piano player and I know she loves the piano so much. Its hard to see her so frustrated and stuck in a cycle of stress and anxiety at the tender age of 7 years old...

I was exhausted after Reuben's piano (that I don't even do anything for, I sit in the playroom with the girls while he has his lesson) and then we went home and did math and chores and read Winter Tales and went on a walk. Followed by a lot of resting. 

On the walk, 2/3 of the way home, Esther decided she wanted to be carried. The problem was she had a bike, so I could not carry both her and the bike. Anyway, I tried to carry her bike and get her to walk and she had a full on tantrum in the middle of the road and I may have internally contemplated my life choices as I tried to get her to come home. Becky finally had to run her own scooter home and come back for the bike and I carried Esther who promptly asked for Bluey when we got home and seemed surprised that she couldn't have her favorite TV show after throwing a tantrum in the middle of the road. 

Being two is wild.

Then I had chocolate and tea. And worked on my cardigan which has one arm done now!! SO excited. It's going to be gorgeous.

After all that I did NOT want to make dinner. But no one was going to save me, I am the adult in this relationship and so I made pizza and everyone was happy and I was glad I freeze sourdough pizza crusts like a responsible mom with three kids who does too much and needs a nap.

I do not know how much homeschooling I will get done with Reuben while he does cognitive brain development. Pray for me as I figure it out.

Oh and I had a medium headache today. It was bad enough to be irritating but not bad enough to make me lay down and turn off all the lights.

God is good and I love him. I'm glad he made me.

I'm also out of chocolate which...since I bought three bars on Saturday, is entirely my fault and I have only myself to blame. 

I wonder what Wednesday will bring? I have no idea what to make for breakfast tomorrow, I put the baby to sleep with Bluey, and I need to buy more art supplies and one of these for my bedroom. I'm making myself an art nook now that I have a nook again. 

Small blessings and tomorrow's hope. My birthday is in 10 days!